Eva Angelina -- Twitter with a Porn Star

Eva Angelina, seen here, is pretty hot and she's a pornstar, so I guess being hot is her job. Anyways, she's on twitter.  This is really no biggie since every celeb and celeb wannabe is on twitter nowadays.  Bet there are not a lot of 'tweets' that look like this:

"Gotta breathe and practice with the butt plug around house. Just leave it in and get comfortable.”

Thank you Eva for sharing :) God bless the internet!

Sex Search

I am completely bored while in a grad school course. The teacher lectures in a monotone that would put a kid with ADD to sleep. MY GOD!!!


So I am messaging my buddies and we were talking about all the stupid porn sites that are popping up on Myspace. I dont know how they do it, but some people have direct links to them. You click to send them a message or add them, or a bulletin and you are directly transported to some "LIVE WEBCAM GIRLS" site or "HOT GIRLS CUMMING FOR YOU" site.

Now, I admit I occasionally check out a porn site or two, but I am not an addict or anything. Anyway, we are messaging about how many porn sites there are and we decide to kill time by doing some research. We each take a term and decide to do a search for that term. There are 4 of us, so we take 4 terms: Sex, porn, fuck, and XXX. We decide to do a search on Google and Yahoo for each term. I get assigned SEX for my homework.

So I start my search on Google. Within 0.05 seconds, I got the results 1 - 10 of about 77,700,000 for sex. This was the result for my search in the category Web. Now let's move on and try out the other categories... in the category Images my search for sex already took a little bit longer (0.06 seconds) and delivered me results 1 - 20 of about 1,960,000 for sex. SafeSearch was off. Ok, next category: Groups. 0.33 seconds and got the results 1 - 10 of 10,700,000 for the keyword sex. Did you realize something? For the categories Web and Images, the results were always "about" - now for the Groups I get the results without any "about". Don't know if that has some sort of major signifigance or not. Let's do our final search for sex now in the category News. Within 0.32 results 1 - 10 of about 50,200 for sex. Now it again "about". So only within the category Groups, the results are exactly? That is weird.

So here is the breakdown for Google:

Web: about 77,700,000 results for sex
Images: about 1,960,000 results for sex
Groups: 10,700,000 results for sex
News: about 50,200 results for sex

But what about Yahoo? Does Yahoo get the same number of results for sex? Let's try it out...

I start again with the Category Web and entered "sex" into the searchmask. 0.01 seconds and I had results 1 - 10 of about 313,000,000 for sex. Let's move on to the category Images. This category gives me results 1 - 20 of about 7,676,451 for sex within 0.04 seconds. On Yahoo we have a new category Video, so I checked this out too: the search took 0.04 seconds and gave me 280,799 results for sex. Another category we didnt have on Google is Directory, which has just 4,299 results for sex. The next one we can compare again: News. Within this category there are 32,100 results for sex. A very interesting one was the last category Shopping. I would have expected at least some results here - but: 0 results for sex. So where are all the sex-shops?!

Here again the results for the keyword sex at Yahoo, of the categories we also have at Google:

Web: about 313,000,000 results for sex
Images: about 7,676,451 results for sex
News: 32,100 results for sex

So in general it seems, for the keyword sex, Yahoo is the winner actually in the categories Web and Images. Google is the winner in the category News.

Of course there are a lot of other search engines out there too - but did not have the time to check 'em out all and Google and Yahoo are my favorite ones, if I am looking for something on the web

Anyway, I am posting my results. I am going to wait and see if my research colleagues did their part. Hopefully, I will get some info from them to post in the near future. We are all in this class, but at different sites. It is a TV type course. Two of the guys couldnt search for their words since it was blocked at the school site they were at. They promise they will get it done tonight.

I guess that is it. Man, I am soooooo bored!!!!!!! If anyone wants any other search comparisons, post them. Maybe I can do some type of research paper on internet sex searches. Maybe we are becoming a perverse society!!!!! ;)

Swinging

OK...Open minds I guess.  He could watch me and the girl with those boobs!!!!  I have no problem with that.

Nice Try, But you Really Should Learn How to Use Photoshop

Women, and men for that matter, are constantly trying to make themselves look better. They have come to use Photoshop to enlarge certain things, erase blemishes, etc. As you can see, sometimes these "adjustments" are made in haste. Always make sure you straighten out the background lines (in this case a wall) when you try to make your boobs bigger!

Do You Think She Gets the Joke?

My Idiot Cousin

I have this cousin, nice guy, but sometimes he is a little stupid. Anyway, he came to visit us this weekend and we all went out. Last night we all were partying and got pretty messed up. He actually separates from us and goes with this girl. I heard him come home at about 4 AM. This morning, he comes out to eat breakfast and his hand is all orange. I ask what the fuck is the matter and the rest are his words:


"Well I'm not going to say what I did but It was some good stuff. This girl and I were messing around, but then her freakin parents come home. They had been to a wedding reception and she thought they were already home and in bed. So we had to stop and I snuck out. What we were doing, It made me extremely horny, and I had to ...well you know. There wasnt any getting around it, I HAD TOO! I race to your house and I can't stand it. So i went into the bathroom and grabbed some lotion, ran back into the guest bedroom. Everything was all good, and when all was said and done I took a shower went to sleep. Well I wake up today, and go to the bathroom. I look down at my hand, and the whole thing is bright orange! My fingernails and everything! So I go to the bathroom and look at the lotion and it was freakin self tanner! So now two parts of my body are bright, bright, bright orange!!!!! I tried to scrub it off but I can't. I guess that I just have ta let it wear off. I am so embarrased! And I have to go home to my parents in a couple hours. I have no clue what I am going to tell them."

Just to clarify the only reason I'm telling everyone about this is because it was so freaking funny, I was laughing for an hour. He ended up using the tanning lotion that we had. His lower stomach and his dick and balls are orange. It is hilarious. He is 19, but still lives with his parents. I cant wait to see their reaction and hear his excuse!!!

Hottie of the Day

MEET ANNA!!!

One Advantage of Winter - Tight Sweaters

It’s getting cold out and while I have always prefered women wearing less clothes, if you need to stay warm a nice sweater works. By nice we mean one that’s tight, form fitting. Here are a few more for your enjoyment.

Hottie of the Day

Brazilian Hottie Karina Flores

GOD I LOVE BRAZIL!!!  I have been there a couple of times and I can attest that there are alot of women there that look like this!!  GOD BLESS BRAZIL

Hope Everyone Had a Great Thanksgiving -- I DID!!

Here was my Thanksgiving Dinner!

DESSERT WAS AWESOME!  :)

Hottie of the Day

NICE POSE!

Hottie of the Day

Argentinian Model Melina Pitra

Jenna Haze Going Mainstream?

I don't think so, but Jenna did do an classy photo shoot for Strip Magazine. For those that do not know, Jenna is one of the porn stars that has done some mainstream movie stuff. There have been rumors that she is going to give up porn and start only doing mainstream movies, but it hasn't been confirmed. 

I'll let you google her for all the Jenna action you want. I have always been a fan of hers, been a pleasure to watch :) She has a website, (do I need to even tell you NSFW), and here's another pic (NSFW) from her shoot for Strip Magazine. 

The Broken Hand

Well we were partying it up at the bar, and needless to say I was pretty blasted and apparentely I punched a chair and then tried to karate chop a pool table....later on in the evening I somehow made it home. I have no idea how. I wake up in the morning with my hand just throbbing and feeling rather like it is shattered!! I look at my hand only to find a sock over my hand with a clenched fist and duct tape wrapped up to my elbow as a make shift cast!! Don't remember doing this, but it gets better! So I get up to go to the can and find my clothes all over the floor on the way to the washroom and in the hallway there is a bag of pitas! Where the hell do you get a bag of pita bread at 3 in the morning!! So I decide to go to the hospital and have my hand looked at. I get dressed and head out to my car. It isnt out there. I lived in an apartment complex so I start walking all over the parking lot to find the car, but no luck. I say screw it and I take the bus to the hospital. People are staring at me since I have a sock with duct tape on me and I look like death!!! I finally make it to the hospital and my hand is broken in two places. I call my friends to pick me up and we go back to the place of the party and find my car. A fun night that I don't remember!

Hottie of the Day

SALLY FERREIRA - HOT, HOT, HOT!!!! 

Look at that Booty!!!!

The Reason I Lived Alone for So Long

For one semester back in college I was sure I’d be the first man killed by a psychotic sleep walker. I had two roommates, James and Gabe. James was never around. He paid his rent, but his girlfriend had a place of her own paid for by Daddy Big Bucks. Gabe was always fucking there. The Dude had no other place to be. He had a blonde afro the size of Epcot Center, and it was on purpose. He had it permed every couple of months. Even had a mustache like Magnum P.I. But he paid his share of the rent and managed to make the preppy/redneck style look good and that was all I cared about.


I was up flipping channels on the TV at 2:00 one morning when I heard his shower come on. I thought it was odd that he’d get up in the middle of the night to shower, but maybe he’d been spanking the monkey and forgotten to use a sock or tissues to avoid the mess. It happens. He got up at 6:00 and showered again. I asked him why his ass had to use up all the hot water when he’d just showered a few hours before. He said I was full of shit. Why would he get up in the middle of the night to take a shower?

Whatever, bro.

A few weeks later I was up again watching TV when I heard shouting. Gabe’s door flung open so hard it hit the wall and he ran into the living room screaming. “He’s in my bed! He’s in my bed!”

Bullshit. Who in the hell would get into Gabe’s bed? He stood in the corner, whining and shaking his left arm with his right hand. Crazy bastard. I reached around the wall and flipped the light switch without going in, just in case he wasn’t out of his goddamned mind after all, but when I looked in there was nothing but a pile of crumpled sheets.
“Dude, there’s nobody in here.”

“I felt him, I felt him! I touched his arm.”

To this day, I believe that he had fallen asleep on his arm, it went numb, and he touched his own hand thinking it belonged to another man in his bed. By morning, Gabe had no recollection of the entire thing.

The day Gabe brought a 9mm back to the apartment I nearly shit my pants. “What in the – Fuck no! Uh uh, no, bitch. Take that shit out of here.” Gabe was going through his gangsta phase. Listening to NWA, drinking 40’s, and trying to be a gangbanger.

He said he needed it for his protection. He was starting to run with a rough crowd.

“Protection from what? You're the weirdest fucker in the whole complex" I said.

He insisted he needed the gun for his safety. He put it in his nightstand in his bedroom and told me where I could find it if I ever needed it. Yeah, when hell freezes over.

A few days later it was just after midnight when Gabe’s door creaked open. I looked up and saw four fingers, an eye and part of a ‘fro showing through the narrow gap in the doorway. The eyeball started roaming all around the room, not looking at anything in particular, then it and the ‘fro slowly disappeared behind the door, the fingers slipped back inside, and the door closed gently.

I went to my bedroom, locked the door, and didn’t come out until the sun was up. The next morning, Gabe and I had a long talk. I told him it was either him or I. One of us had to go. I knew damn well he couldn’t afford to split the rent two ways. He got on the phone, made a few calls. I went to class and when I got home, he was gone. He had cleared out his clothes, but left all of his other personal shit. CD’s, books, notebooks, his walkman, etc were all still there. I waited weeks for him to come back for the stuff, but I never saw him again. He was gone. Mr. Gabe had a new place to live. I learned that he dropped out of school later that week and no one knew where he went. His parents called to talk to him about 2 weeks after he left. They had no clue that he had moved out. To this day, I am not sure what happened. He could be dead for all I know. Maybe somebody was after him. All I know is that he was a crazy motherfucker!!

After him, I lived alone for about 12 years. Sure, I would have girls spend the night sometimes, maybe even a week or two, but I never really moved in with anyone long-term for a good while. One weird psycho roommate is enough.

New Use for Suspenders -- I like it!

Any ladies want to borrow my suspenders?

Do we need this sign?

Not sure where this sign is -- Looks like a subway or bus.  If you need to post a sign, I think you have some problems!!

Hottie of the Day

Danish Blonde, Malene Espensen

A Strong Hottie

Usually those Muscle Building Women are kind of manly looking and not attractive at all, but this lady is HOT!!!!!!  I wish I could work her out!

Need a Job -- Porn is Hiring

The economy is slumping, people aren't spending the way they have, and torrents are to blame for everything, so what's a key grip or best boy to do? Go work on porn. It used to be, in the high-flying eighties, if you weren't union you had to start out in porn, but since porn is the only one hiring these days those same film crewmembers have to look towards the seedy side of filmmaking to get the bills paid. Poor Sasha Gray - she worked so hard to break out, and a bad economy will just keep pulling her in!

Low Jeans and High Thongs!

I LOVE THONGS!!!! VIVA LA THONG!!!! But there is one way to ruin the thong. I have never liked the girls that wear those low, low cut jeans and then pull their thong up so you see about 4 inches of thong. It is even worse when they push down the low cut jeans another couple of inches. Come on!!! The magic of the thong is in catching a glimpse of it. Part of what makes thong watching fun is when some chick bends over to pick something up and there it is, the thong!! It appears for a second, then it is gone again. Or maybe when a girl is wearing some tight workout shorts and you can see the outline of the thong underneath. Or a girl wearing jeans and the top of the thong is barely visible. This is excitement. This is what the Thong is all about. Anyway, you get my point. I did find a pic of a girl that found a way to get around the low jeans/high thongs delimma.

I think that is a good and acceptable option. If you aren't gonna wear a thong, don't wear anything at all!!

I Feel Like Taking Some Body Shots Tonight

My Goal for tonight - 3 Body Shots of Tequila!!! 

Hottie of the Day

Interesting Bikini!!!!!!

Love-Making Bloopers

What's The Funniest Thing That's Ever

Happened To You Or Someone
You Know While Making Love?

Anna-Lee in Alaska:

"After attending a football game, my boyfriend and I went back to my house to have a little fun. While we were having sex, my kitten had jumped onto the answering machine. Somehow the feline had pressed the record button, taping out moans of pleasure onto the machine. An hour later my mother called to ask how the game was. Her exact message: 'How many touchdowns does it take in order to satisfy you?'"

Chris in Illinois:

"Me and my fiance were having a romantic night with candlelight. We started going at it and when we went to change positions I hit the table where the candle was and hot wax spilt all over my penis."
Diane in Missouri:

"I wanted to share how I embarrassed my hubby's doctor. He got a vasectomy and after the operation the doc asked if I had any questions. He said not to worry because he has heard it all before. After thinking for a minute, I asked, "Hey doc, will it taste the same?" I never knew I could make a doctor blush ."

Anonymous in Illinois:

"8 months after the birth of our first child, my husband and I decided to have a little fun. So he made a pallet on the floor for our child, then came back to the bedroom and proceeded to pleasure me with his hands. We had all the lights off, and it was dark, when he reached for the K-y jelly, squirted some on his hand, and started rubbing me with it. It didn't seem to be working very well, so he reached for some more. When that didn't work either, he turned on the light and realized his mistake. He had grabbed the baby Desitin instead!! I immediately took and shower and washed it out, but needless to say, the mood was totally ruined!!"

That's a Big Booty

I think this girl has been shooting too many steroids into her ass!!

Hottie of the Day

MEET HOTTIE LORISSA!!!

Lucky Monkey

I don't often want to be a monkey, but I would trade places with this one. Think he copped a feel?

Hottie of the Day

Stephanie Spleiss

Messy Kitchen

Is it just me, or did anyone else notice how messy that kitchen is. I hope she is cleaning out the fridge!!!

International Skin Flicks

Last night was a boy's poker night. As usual, we got together, played some cards, drank a lot of beer, and talked about sports, sex, and women. The conversation quickly turned to porn.

As many of you know, I was once a purveyor of porn. I have seen my share of Jenna Jameson getting her boobs squirted on or Chasey Lain getting banged by Ron Jeremy and Peter North. Unfortunately, I have not been watching a lot of porn as of late. I don't have time, nor the desire since, after awhile, it all becomes the same.

Anyway, I spent much of the 90's traveling abroad. I have been all over Asia and South America. One thing that these two areas have in common is a plethora of pirated videos, many of them pornos. I have had the good fortune to experience international porn. A couple of the other guys had also spent some time abroad and had seen their fair share of skin flicks from around the world as well.Here are some of our observations.

Thai porn - insufficient breast footage (maybe because there are not too many big breasted chicks in Thailand), Seems very rehearsed and unnatural. Cheap sets. A huge interest in She-Male porn. Much of the mainstream porn included at least the appearance of a transsexual or transvestite.

Indian porn - too much story, too little action; the music was very distracting, It seemed like the actresses were more concerned with actually acting rather than the sex. Like they would be found by some Bollywood producer.

Japanese porn - unhappy pissed off looking girls, odd fetishes. Too many knee-high sock and bukkake issues. Also, lots of bondage

French porn - hairy girls, always trying to look art-house. Nice lingerie and costumes though

German porn - very high quality, very dirty, hot girls. The girls would do anything. They would be peed on, shat on, forced to drink the cum of 20 men. Weird stuff. The Mercedes-Benz of filth.

East Euro porn - even hotter girls, no story or plot, just porn. It went from one scene straight to another. No lead in.

American porn - the gold standard. Thanks to everyone in the San Fernando Valley.

Italian porn - I think Italian porn was the best. The girls were the hottest, the sex scenes were beautifully shot, there was some decent acting, and the settings were elaborate. They treat it like a big time production. Very well done Italy.

Hottie of the Day

Sofia Webber is Hot!!!!

Hottie of the Day

HI!!  Starting a new feature -- The Hottie of the Day.  I will try and post one each day.  ENJOY!!!!!!

For the first edition, a two for one special.  BEACH HOTTIES!!!

Why Brazil Rules in Soccer and just about everything else!

Damn!!! I wished I was back in Brazil!!!

10 Things That Piss Me Off

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is buddy, where the fu*k is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the bathroom is?


2. The Pillsbury doughboy is way too happy considering he has no dick.

3. People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.

4. When people say, ''Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too. ''Fu*k off. What good is a goddamn cake you can't eat? What, should I eat someone else's cake instead?

5. When people say, ''It's always in the last place you look.'' Of course it is. Why the Fu*k would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?

6. When people say, while watching a movie, ''Did you see that?'' No dickhead, I paid $7.50 to come to the theatre and stare at the ceiling?

7. I still get pissed off by that 90's radio ad: ''Hi, I'm Jeff Healey from the Jeff Healey Band. Don't drink and drive. I don't.'' Well, I hope you don't drive sober either Mr. Healey. You're blind for God's sake

8. People who ask, ''Can I ask you a question?'' Didn't really give me a choice, didja there buddy?

9. When something is ''new and improved.'' Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it.

10. When a cop pulls you over and then asks if you know how fast you were going? You should know asshole, you fu*king pulled me over.

THE THONG!!!!!!

What is it about the power of the thong that to this day -- now that pretty much every female walking the earth is wearing one -- holds men enraptured? Dude, I recall that, in the dark, pre-thong era, seeing a glimmer of some chick's underwear when she bent over was so cool. In high school, if you catching a glimpse of a girls underwear was an achievement that you bragged about to your friends for weeks. Your friends would look at you in awe as you described the color and design of the hot cheerleaders underwear you saw. But seeing underwear 10 years ago never instilled the lascivious, sinister thoughts that somehow the sight of a thong incurs.

Case in point: I just returned from the mall, and one of the girls working at some clothing store was a big girl; not immense, but she had to go at least a good 200 pounds. Every time she bent over, she flashed some big thong action, and every guy within a 50 yard radius would stop and watch, spellbound. I mean, every guy. And not in a "holy shit, look at that" kinda way, but more in a "mmmmmm.... thongs" kinda way. I doubt they were turned on by it. I mean she wasnt exactly a looker. But the guys were turned on by the thong. My friend Brent says a thong automatically raises a girl a point or two on the hotness scale.

It's magic, people. Anyway, to every chick out there wearing a thong today, I salute you.